It's your life

This world is an interesting one and a very interesting time that we are living in.

Perhaps it's that my life is surrounded by a strong varied and diverse range of people and groups. I love to see things from all angles and understand all perspectives. Even those that are clearly not my perspective but, in case you haven't picked up on this yet, I'm an incredibly curious person. Always seeking to know and understand more. I certainly consider myself open minded yet getting more and more sure of who I am and what fits well in my world, accepting those around me and how they choose to live/act/etc.

"It's your life" - I love this saying but it is really interesting when you think about it. There is over 7.9 billion people in this world and each of us is living a unique life. No matter how many circumstances might be aligned or similar, no two lives are exactly the same.

So interesting, yeah? No? Just me? Are you not at all curious? Curiosity is fantastic. But, right now, this world is full of so much hate and it's super exhausting. Everywhere you turn right now and everyone you talk to is expressing their anger and frustrations in amplified volumes. Sure, there is Covid, lockdowns, politics, global warming, potential threat of world wars, constant updates of violence, hate crimes and everything else. I could keep listing but just writing the list alone is angering.

With all this added "stuff" going on on top of trying to 'live our lives' it's a great to stop, pause and question, is this really living?

As Viktor Frankl, an Austrian Neurologist and holocaust survivor, wrote, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.”

If you're interested in learning more from Viktor Frankl's life and learnings from his experiences, I highly recommend his book, Man's Search for Meaning. It is an incredibly insightful read and a great resource to remind yourself of the choice you still have, even in the worst of circumstances, you can still choose your attitude.

I know I'm exhausted from hearing the news updates. They're important. I get tired of listening to the news agents ask questions that have already been answered in the live updates. Heck, like most people, I get so many notifications, updates, messages, calls in a single day that it makes me wonder how we ever lived prior to all this technology. It's definitely a contributing factor to why I love my daily beach walks and ability to silence the noise by listening to the waves.

Here's the thing, it's my life, just like it's your life, and you have the ability to choose, as do I, our attitudes in these circumstances. This is why I choose to not contribute to hate or anger. I don't feed into the dramas or trolls that try to encourage further pain and rage. I choose to filter who I respond to and when. Most of my apps have notifications turned off completely. I utilise my phone's 'do not disturb' function so that I don't get alerts between certain hours, especially late at night or early morning.

That last one is especially useful when one of my staff text messages me at 5am to say they are sick, "sorry if I woke you". I laugh when I read those messages at 7am. You won't ever wake me because it's my life and I choose to sleep.

We should really be utilising technology to bring us more joy and manage our lives for the better. If you're feeling anger and upset to any of the above list or the not mentioned but equally angering things that are going on right now, I would urge you to consider a few things:

• What could you be doing to filter out the noise? i.e. get into nature, take breaks, turn off technology for an hour

• Who in your life tends to contribute to angering you or who do you feel worse around?

• Are there ways you could filter out that person's impact on you and your feelings/ moods? i.e. if online: unfollow or 'mute' them, choose when you give attention to them, do you need them in your life?

• What are your newsfeeds filled with? You control what appears there based on what you click, like, follow and interact with. If you are seeing a lot of what you don't like, start being selective with what you interact with.

• If work is what is adding to your stress and anger during this time, what can you do to ensure you maintain normal rhythms and allow yourself to have down time to care for your own wellbeing? You work better when you are at your best. Regular breaks and some FUN are super important!

• Speaking of, what one small thing can you do to add fun into your day?

Also, not to sound cliché but this is really important, are you ensuring you maintain healthy diet, exercise, drinking water and good sleep? These things are usually the first we let slide and greatly impact everything else. Often, taking a few small steps to ensure we take care of these things is the best place to start in prioritising our own mental wellbeing. Physical health greatly contributes to our mental health as well.

Be honest with yourself. I know it's easy to say yes and I'm guilty of saying yes to looking after my diet, exercise, water and sleep and yet, proceed to stay up till 1am video gaming and snacking on junk. But hey, it's good, right? Wrong... and generally, I pay for it the next day when I feel sluggish, tired and start getting angrier over the smallest things.

But hey, it's your life. You choose how you want to spend it. I am certainly going to choose to keep my open mind, filter the noise and reduce the negativity from my life. All I need to focus on is what I can control and that is my own thoughts, feelings and actions. How I control what I feed myself with, literally and electronically. And how I contribute to my own world around me.

If you've read this and you're feeling any kind of exhausted, angry, burned out, over it, just absolutely done right now. You may not be in a space to answer the questions above and be honest with yourself. You may not care to even consider this right now. If this is you, I see you. I've been there. I know. Can I ask you to do one thing? Turn your phone off (I find throwing mine to the other side of the room helps), and go and do something fun. Like super fun... RIGHT NOW! Crank the music on the radio and sing loudly, in a silly voice if it helps, and dance!

If that's not your vibe, that's ok. Follow your heart, what would bring you a teeny bit of joy right now? Fun fact, in some of my darkest times, my daily Starbucks coffee was the one thing that made me smile every day many years ago. It's why I don't care if I'm labelled a cliché basic bitch. Call me what you want but that one small thing that doesn't impact anyone else brought me so much joy. If that's your vibe, go get a big as ridiculous drink, get something fun to eat like that candy you had as a kid! Or, go to your nearest beach and watch the happy people around you enjoying the sand and sea.

Gosh, I'm feeling all kinds of goodness just writing these. I would love to hear what you do that cheers you up! What do you do to pick up your mood or bring a little smile to your face? Chuck your ideas in the comments. Maybe someone will get a little something from reading what you do.

It's your life, Brit Army, live it. For you.